home sickness

it was an acute onset of extreme homesickness. suddenly i had the urge of curling up like a ball and allowing a few drops of tears to be squeezed out from my myopic eyes. i longed to feel the soft, bushy fur of my forever faithful nicky boy. I can't wait to have a decent dinner with my parents and my silly lil baby bro. to make matters worst, cafu is always on call. i had no calls... that forced me into a state of poverty. I am craving for mommy's soup so much now that i swear that i can feel it trickling down my throat.

I will going home next week but i hate it when everybody is so concerned with my marriage. The problem is i am not at all ready to be somebody's wife. I still feel so young. There are so many things that i want to do. I can't imagine me wearing that white gown in the next 5 years.

please stop asking me when i am getting married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

can i just have some peaceful time at home? without STRESS?

thank you

tomato red banana

the night is as quiet as it used to be and i just can't force my eyes to shut. A sense of embarrassment kept hovering me like dark clouds which were about to pour torrentiously. i am invariably ashamed of myself for not being able to speak proper mandarin + hokkien.

i was sitting with Dr K in the clinic this morning. A malay girl came to seek consultation for osteochondroma and she told me ..... 'Dr, i can speak mandarin'..... i ended up speechless, practically hunting for the right words to defend myself that i am not a banana afterall. Then, my lovely cornea caught the sight of Dr K laughing at me sarcastically. he was nice enough to explain to the patient about her condition in mandarin. i thought that he was nice. how innocent!!! he was then desribing how verbal constipated i was to the other MOs. of course, there was a burst of laughter which seemed to be contagious, enough to stir a commotion in the OPD. i stood there, warm blood gushing proximally to paint my cheeks tomato red. if i were an ostrich, i would have dug a hole and buried my blushed face!!!

So, i am a chinese who looked like a chinese but can't speak chinese!!